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C

The simple girlfriend that doesn't really get you. Whenever you go to a new place, she doesn't want to go. Goes if you really insist, but causes a scene there.

C++

The borderline insane girlfriend. One mistake, and she goes bonkers. Tries to be friends with all of your friends, even if no one likes her.

Python

Your true love, but you know deep inside you two won't last. She's nice, but whenever you want something from her she's nowhere to be found.

Java

Boring as hell. You pity her and you think you should like her more. You just can't get yourself to do it. She keeps trying to make it work.

C#

The slightly prettier sister of Java, with all the mental issues of C++.

PHP

The beast from Beauty and the Beast. Reasoning with her is like talking with a grizzly bear.

Perl

She always hungers for human flesh. Congratulations, you're dating a zombie.

 

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